Sunday, March 30, 2008

My speech from Caden's memorial today

Thank you so much for joining us today to celebrate the very short life of our son Caden. I suppose that normally at a memorial we would talk about all the wonderful things a person did in their life. Unfortunately we never got the chance to really know Caden. We never imagined we would have to say goodbye before we said hello.

So I wanted to have this opportunity for all of us to acknowledge Caden, your love and support contributed to his existence and I’m sure he knows how much he was and is loved. Thankyou to everyone who has been thinking of us and Caden over the past few weeks, and for the flowers and cards. They do mean a lot and it does make a difference knowing there are so many people thinking of him and grieving with us.

He had a short life but he was loved so immensely in that time. Although we never got to hear his sweet little voice, you can be assured he knew the voice of every person here who used to talk to my belly before they would talk to me.

I didn't have to look into your eyes
to fall in love with you.
I didn't have to hear your cry
to know you loved me too.
I didn't need to hold your hand
to cherish you always.
Within my womb, we shared our hearts.
You touched my soul.
You sweetened my spirit.
You gave me memories I'll always hold dear.
Yes, my heart aches since you departed too soon.
But A MOTHER'S LOVE does not end with death.
For you are my child
Forever my love is yours.

We still have no answers for what caused his death and we may never know. We were told that he passed away on the Tuesday and he was born at 2:41pm on the Wednesday the 27th February. We got to spend many precious hours with him to make memories. He has dark, dark little eyes, and light eyebrows. His hair is fluffy and longer and darker on the sides. It’s almost strawberry blonde on top and dark brown on the sides. He has the brightest red lips and tiny ears, practically paper thin. He has Rory’s nose with tiny milk spots. His tiny hands still point with his index finger like in the ultrasound and he has such long feet! His big toes are shorter than his second toes!

All that we have left now are our memories. We know that you all have memories, hopes and dreams, thoughts of the future that involved Caden. We are putting together a memory book and have paper on the table that we would love each of you to write something to be included. Whatever you feel is good, be it a message to Caden, to us, about the hopes and dreams you had for him or anything you feel.

Please don’t ever be afraid to mention Caden’s name. We love him and love to talk about him. We may cry a bit but don’t be afraid.

The mention of my child's name
May bring tears to my eyes,
But it never fails to bring music to my ears.
If you are really my friend,
Let me hear the beautiful music of their name.
It soothes my broken heart, and sings to my soul.

We will always celebrate Caden’s birthday, and would always welcome you to celebrate it with us. Although our baby is not with us, he is our son and we love him.

Little one, little one
Where have you gone?
Your going has darkened
The brightest dawn
Why did you leave us
So soon, so soon?
Where can we look for you?
Over the moon?
On butterflies' wings
In the heart of a rose?
Who knows,
who knows
Where a little one goes?
Where I have gone,
I am not so small
My soul is as wide
As the world is tall.
Wherever you look,
You will find me there~
In the heart of a rose,
In the heart of a prayer.
On butterflies' wings,
On wings of my own,
To you, I'm gone,
But I'm never alone~
I'm over the moon.
I am home.


Mom to 2 boys +? said...

That is such a beautiful speech! You can tell the love that is on your heart for Caden. I love the poems that you read, I copied the one about speaking his name to put on my blog. Sending ya'll lots of love!
Kara (mom to 2 boys+?)

Holli said...

I hope that the memorial service will help you heal. For me, it really helped. I also loved the poems about speaking his name. I'd like to copy it and post it on my blog too. I wish you and your family peace and healing in the coming days.

Becky said...

Oh sweetheart, you Caden is such a gorgeous little guy and your speech moved me to tears. I am so very sorry for your loss. A thousand sorries won't do justice for how truly sorry I am.


I sent you an email and wanted to see if I could use Caden's name in my dedication on my blog. I think it's such a beautiful name for such a sweet baby.

Christine (Lucy's Mom) said...

brooke & kim- i think it must have been just a lovely service for your sweet son.


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